Beauty in the Boring

I have started and stopped this post several times now. 

I get a few sentences in, read what I have just written, and then hit the delete button. 

This has been seeming to have happened almost every time I sit down at my computer anymore.

At first, I was overwhelmed with all I could write about.  Then that turned to frustration that I could at least get something down on paper and now, I’m in this weird space of wanting to write, but feeling like I don’t have anything to write about. 

Now yes, I understand how silly that sounds.  

After all, I should have all of these wild crazy stories about my life this year right? 

All of the wonderful food we are eating and all of the wild places that we are going and and and….

While there are great stories and memories that I am creating, there are also so many ordinary and mundane things that I am doing. 

Sometimes it is easy in life to focus on all of the super amazing moments, and often those are the ones that get posted about on Facebook or Instagram.  When we do this, it makes our life on the outside look like these incredible highlight reels full on constant adventure and high quality moments.  

Here recently I have started to realize how dangerous it is for me to do that while on something like the World Race. I have come to realize that I want the exact opposite thing for my Facebook, instagram, blog, or any conversation that I have. I want everyone to know and realize and understand that yes, there are incredible moments while being on the race.  There are moments that will seriously change my life forever.  But there are also small mundane and ordinary moments. 

It is those small moments that I have been having a lot more of here recently.  And circling back around to what I wrote at the beginning of this blog, these moments have left me stumped with what to share with you all.  I fell into the trap of the “highlight reel” that I felt like you all wanted.  I was putting this expectation on my writings and didn’t even realize that I was doing it. 

I didn’t realize it until a recent phone conversation with one of my friends from back home.  I voiced my frustrations as stated above and she met me with the most simple yet profound piece of advice.  She said “Kayla, maybe you aren’t having these big break through moments with God, and that is okay.  But it is still important to write about those ordinary moments you have been having with Him.  Because people back home are having those ordinary moments too. And it is important to tell the full story of what you are going through. Maybe it will speak to them and God wants to use that.”

Wow was I convicted.  

After she gave me this piece of advice, I felt convicted and like I needed to open up about my experience.  All of my experiences, no matter how mundane.  So here is a list of seemingly mundane or ordinary things that I still have to do, even while on the race (specifically in the last few weeks) – 

• Living on a budget – each month we get a budget for food.  This month, our team has split up that money and we get an “allowance” to last us the full week. 
• Cooking dinner – as stated above, we are cooking for ourselves this month.  Most days, our ministry provides one meal a day for us, but we are responsible for the other two.
• Grocery shopping – again….as stated above….we are cooking on our own and living within a budget.  Grocery shopping this month looks like walking about eight blocks to a street full of fresh produce stands.  Luckily, their produce here (at least in our area) has been cheap so far – 6 Sol for 1 kilogram of strawberries (about $1.50 for 2.2 lbs), 1 sol ($0.26) for 1 avocado, 1 sol for a sandwich baggie full of precut veggies (peppers, carrots, peas, broccoli, beets, onions, corn), 2 sol ($0.51) for 5 bananas
• Team time – every day we have team time where we have feedback and talk about our day. This is a time where we can watch a movie, read the Bible, play a game, worship, or just hang out as a team.
• Going to the gym – this month I have realized how important is it to take care of our physical bodies. And how much our physical health plays a role on our emotions as well as our minds. Thankfully, this month we have the ability to go to a gym that is a few blocks away.  
• Time alone – alone time and the world race are rarely in the same sentence.  However, it is SO important to take time away and recharge with the Lord alone.  Some people might be fine to never spend time alone, but the introvert in me needs it every now and then. 

Now I know you might’ve been tempted to just scan over that list and now you’ve ended up here without reading it.  But I would encourage you to go back and actually read each of the points above.  They aren’t big and spectacular, but they are real life.  And this past month especially, it has been incredible to see how God can make the most out of the ordinary.  

He has shown up in the small conversations with the people in the markets as I try to navigate Spanish and they try to navigate English. They ask questions about why I (an American who clearly knows barely any Spanish) am in their country and I get to share that I am a Christian Missionary and I am here because I love God and this is where He sent me. 

He is in the small fist bumps and head nods to the workers as I enter and exit the gym each day. 

He was there when Team Candor on our ATL Day met a father and his son on the streets needing help. 

He was there when we stopped and talked to a police officer and were able to share about our lives as well as about the Holy Trinity. 

God has shown up in such cool ways this month.  And the truth of the matter is, He has been doing this the whole race and even my whole life. It is sooooo easy to get caught in the trap of wanting to make your life look like a highlight reel on Facebook, instagram, TikTok, etc. But I have had to ask myself this question and I would encourage you to ask yourself the same thing: Why am I posting this? What is my true intention behind this post? What am I hoping to get/gain from this post? 

It is also important for me to remember that it really might be okay for me to make that post. But I have to be careful of my heart behind why I am wanting to post it.  Am I truly making the post because I want you all to see all of the parts of this journey I am on with the Lord? Or am I making the post in order to see how many likes/comments I get? 

If you take nothing else from this blog, I hope you take this:

God is powerful. He is mighty and powerful and He wants to move in my life, in your life, and in the lives of those around us. God is moving every hour, every minute, every second.  It just sometimes doesn’t look like the big miracles we are expecting to physically see.  But the change of a heart or the kindness you show someone in the mundane and ordinary moments can sometimes be the biggest miracle of all. 

“The thing about kindness is that we rarely realize the impact it has on someone that truly needs it. It’s not difficult to be kind, yet to some people the world feels so cruel.  Even from a stranger, kindness can make the darkest days so much more bright.  So remember to be kind to your family, be kind to your friends, be kind to the person who takes your coffee order, the bus driver and so on.  You. Have so much kindness with you, and you never know who needs it most.”

– Unknown